29 November 2011


Today is my sweet, busy boy's 3rd birthday! We have A THREE in the house. He can't quite make his fingers show the number, but on the inside, he knows he's getting into Big Boy Land, and he loves it. And we love him. More than words or photos can ever say. He is ours and we are so completely his.

* * * * * * * *

On his last day being two, I snapped a few of this busy little maker, engaged in one of his top tasks: "zesting" play-doh. Never knew you could zest the stuff, but shows what I know. It's a very serious business!

23 November 2011

thoughts and thanks

tastes like autumn

I was going to write a long list of all the things that I'm feeling thankful for this Autumn, my favorite of seasons. You know, I do love a list. But there are so many particulars that just gathering my thoughts on the matter was overwhelming. My thanks, today at least, won't submit to lining up and standing still. How about a little ramble instead?

I'm thankful for the big stuff: my two best guys, my brothers and the rest of our scattered family, still-crisp memories of my parents, my in-laws and their family's open arms, plus dear friends: old, new, those I see, and those I read. You make me smile, think, laugh and weep. I'm thankful for a warm home that is ours, ours, ours. A space to garden that brings so much inspiration, but will wait for me patiently when I need to be elsewhere.

for the love of sticks, part 1

But there's also the little things: a boy who recites books to me at bedtime, a big mug of tea each morning from Toby, golden-pink sunrises, bread and butter, my mom's sewing machine, podcasts while I work, a husband that likes to cook together, a husband who toils in the woodshop/garage on my endless list of projects, a kitty who's chosen to be brave around a certain enthusiastic boy.

soft invasion

I'm thankful for health and an able body that can make, do and deliver. Not to mention the health of those I can't imagine living without.

I hope you all have a very warm and delicious Thanksgiving! We're heading south for the big dinner, followed by a muddy tromp in the woods for an enormous tree. My favorite part.

Until next week!

warm glow on a chilly, wet night

21 November 2011

a heart of blown glass

Friends, you may remember an happily unfolding tale of adoption that I mentioned earlier? Alicia's thousands of readers have been following along, watching the happy preparations for a so, so intensely-wanted baby girl. It's been exhilarating to watch two people prepare to be parents, to actually become parents in the readying, the anticipating, the loving.

But, as Alicia says, things fell apart. Three words that sound mild, but are nothing but in meaning. I've been walking around today with a hole in my heart, now that I know how the story has changed, has ended. I've been thinking of Alicia and Andy all day and wanted to share their story... It's a sad one to be sure, but it's actually so full of love, and Alicia's writing just sears.

[edit: ooooops. late-night writing snafu: should probably include the link!]

Read Alicia's post here.

20 November 2011

from 180 minutes to zero

sleepy beach baby

I might be totally mistaken, it might be just a phase, but we appear to be... sigh... done with naps.

dun dun dun.

And, I won't sugar coat it: moving onto (yet to be mastered) Quiet Time is a big change in our house. Not long ago, Jacky was the king, the dominator of solid 3-hour naps. Oh the to-do list warfare I used to wage during those hours of silence and not being needed. I think his nap length was pretty unusual for an almost-3, but my, how I came to count on it anyway. I would tuck that boy in, close the door, and tip-toe off to feats of cooking, cleaning, gardening (thank you long-range baby monitor), or maybe a thought-out bit of blogging.

All this whining aside, I'm starting to catch glimpses of a silvery lining. I'll start with the obvious.

Like, 1) he's growing up. Duh. It's awesome. There's a fascinating big boy emerging out of little-ness, and dropping the nap is all bout growing. I embrace it.

2) once the novelty of Big Boy Quiet Time (it's all about marketing) wears off, he might embrace the "quiet" part a bit and conk the heck out.

3) finally, more of a challenge, but so worth it, I imagine: I'm going to have to do some of the stuff I'd previously bang out during naps while he's up. Like, I'm kinda amazed but I managed to bust out the sewing machine and we sewed a new blanket for his bed, kinda together-like. He helped, he learned, no one lost it or got a finger zig-zagged. We cook small things together and he can keep a little busy while I tackle a small task.... But I hope where we're headed is that my role as a keeper of a home can emerge out of the shadows of nap time, and be a familiar sight for Jacky. I'd like him to see me making, doing more. I feel like that's a healthy example. And, frankly it's a good challenge for me.

02 November 2011

< pause >

back to beach

Where I am right now (not on a beach)...

Tired. Slight overwhelm. Too many deep thoughts (none of them blog-ready). I need a breather, friends. You know when you just know you need a new mode, mindset, perspective? That's where I am. I'll be back soon.

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